Sharepoint 2010 Secure Store Service Application Issue

A fresh install of Sharepoint 2010 failed to fully function due to the Secure Store Service Application failing to install correctly. I say "install correctly" because as far as I'm concerned, it should have worked out of the box. As it were, it wasn't. The service application was started, it's there in the service manager, but trying to manage it gave an error message and admonishment to contact the administrator. Duh.

Some inet posts suggested manually stopping and restarting the service and IIS. No good.

A reinstall of Sharepoint didn't help.

Installing a batch of Server 2008 updates didn't help.

Finally found this:
http://www.uhleeka.com/blog/2013/08/sharepoint-2010-secure-store-shared-service-is-not-responding/

Which gave a couple lines of PowerShell commands to "Provision" the service, whatever that means. Well, it worked. Gah!